it is in me...
meet the teacher
always a dreaded night, right?
well...i didn't feel that this year
i'm always nervous when they introduce us in front of all the parents...but when i speak with them in a small group or individually...it now seems different somehow
is it my age?
or
is it because i've changed?
i send out a letter each year to the parents explaining my program...and this is the first year that i've received so many positive comments as feedback
did i not see them before?
or
is it because i've changed?
the few parents i did meet tonight [not too many come to see the french teacher] were quite interested in the program and just coming to see me
i found it very refreshing, almost humbling
my new students were eager to introduce me to their parents
have they always come?
or
is it because i've changed?
a former student came by and talked to me about her new program [she is in highschool in a bilingual program to earn an international degree] - her mother talked about the solid foundation she received in french when she was me for the three years...how that had helped so much in gr. 7 & 8
so often i forget that there are many students that have learned [so much?] from me...even though the struggles of the day with the difficult students make me believe at times my work is futile
over 2000 students have listened to me in the past 14 years...i'm sure many found something worthwhile along the way with me as their teacher
well at least i hope they did
today i don't feel that my teaching is futile...whereas six months ago i was willing to leave teaching forever
is it because it's just a good day?
or
is it because i've changed?
i know my mind is too busy with all of these thoughts
let me just be happy that things are going well - full stop
as haiku reminded me...stop and live
always a dreaded night, right?
well...i didn't feel that this year
i'm always nervous when they introduce us in front of all the parents...but when i speak with them in a small group or individually...it now seems different somehow
is it my age?
or
is it because i've changed?
i send out a letter each year to the parents explaining my program...and this is the first year that i've received so many positive comments as feedback
did i not see them before?
or
is it because i've changed?
the few parents i did meet tonight [not too many come to see the french teacher] were quite interested in the program and just coming to see me
i found it very refreshing, almost humbling
my new students were eager to introduce me to their parents
have they always come?
or
is it because i've changed?
a former student came by and talked to me about her new program [she is in highschool in a bilingual program to earn an international degree] - her mother talked about the solid foundation she received in french when she was me for the three years...how that had helped so much in gr. 7 & 8
so often i forget that there are many students that have learned [so much?] from me...even though the struggles of the day with the difficult students make me believe at times my work is futile
over 2000 students have listened to me in the past 14 years...i'm sure many found something worthwhile along the way with me as their teacher
well at least i hope they did
today i don't feel that my teaching is futile...whereas six months ago i was willing to leave teaching forever
is it because it's just a good day?
or
is it because i've changed?
i know my mind is too busy with all of these thoughts
let me just be happy that things are going well - full stop
as haiku reminded me...stop and live
posted by me at 10:39 p.m.
5 Comments:
you are very right...
i feel i still forget too much...
and look at the negative too often
i am learning :)
great post. i know exactly how you are feeling. since i have started my zen practice the world seems to have opened up to me...or is it because i've changed? i love it!!
:) thanks, haiku!
funny, isn't it...
Changed indeed. And others around you, including conditions, have changed also. All in flux, and tomorrow will be a bit different as well. You are right in looking deeply and realizing the impermanent nature of things. Contemplating change, and how we seek to remain "same" yet how illuminating it really is to see how we are part of life and that is in constant flux. You brought to mind a very nice book by Parker Palmer, "To Know as we are Known." It is a good book about teaching, just as his "Courage to Teach," is also a neat book. That nice moment you experienced of "knowing as you are known" was a flash of insight! All the best to you Marlaine.
thanks for the comment - i will check out the books ;)
i wish i knew myself better...that is a part of my reason for journalling
what a slow process *g*
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